Vladimir Putin “Too much truth here. Kill the journalist.”
Sarah PALIN “Do I come here for the truth? You betcha!”
The “Ikea Four” have finally been released by the Ikea government after repeated appeals from Prime Minister Gordon Brown. The four, a family from Essex, have spent the last three years imprisoned in the Wembley branch of Ikea, and say that they are “relieved to be home”.
The British Potato Board today launches its glitzy campaign to boost sales of the humble spud with its catchy slogan “not just for the Irish”. With potato sales falling after revelations that the food was “kinda plain” and that “you can’t eat it raw, you have to cook it”, the BPB are hoping that their new campaign will promote safe spudding.
Correction: Nick Clegg actually does eat babies
Nigeria’s Scammies Awards pay tribute to hard work and innovation
William Hague appoints himself as Lord Viceroy of India, upsets locals
Cameron condemns creator of Siobhan O’Dowd Facebook tribute page
Orange marches to include freestyle section from 2011
Polar bears exaggerating claims of global warming
Tory MP found in “horrific state of sobriety”
