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The Daily Shame | September 30, 2014

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The fairy tale of nasty magician IDS and King Gideon

The fairy tale of nasty magician IDS and King Gideon

Once upon a time, there was an old magician who had grown nasty over time. His neighbours were scared of him, and avoided him at all costs. They knew him simply as ‘IDS’ but his real name was Ian Duncan Fuckwizard-Smith.

IDS lived in a big house, on top of a hill. Every night, he would creep out of his big front door, and creep down the hill into the town to visit the poor and the sick people.

IDS would creep up to their bedroom windows, and use his very long arms to stretch into their bedrooms, and feel around for money. He would take any gold coins he found, and put them in his big, deep pockets.

And then, as quickly as he arrived, he was gone. Poof! In a puff of smoke.

And then, every night, the nasty old magician would go to visit the evil King Gideon, who lived in a gold-plated castle, and offer his gold pieces to him.

One night, however, evil King Gideon told the nasty magician:

“You are doing a fine job, IDS. A fine job.”

“Why, thank you, King Gideon”, he cowered.

“But I need more money. I have to feed the rich people. Go forth, and tell the poor people to give me all their money.”

IDS bowed before his King.  “Yes, sir, I shall do this. With great pleasure.”

The next day, IDS appeared in the town centre, next to the local branch of Poundsaver, and cast a magic spell.

“Abracadabra, Abracazoom, I’m going to consign you to a lifetime of doom!” He shouted, and magically, all the money disappeared from the pockets of the poor and the sick people.

“Abracadabra, Abracadoo, you don’t need a wheelchair, you can walk too!” He shouted, and all the money disappeared from the pockets of the disabled people.

Anyone who was not poor, ill or disabled stood by and said “this is not a good thing to do, you nasty magician. You must stop it now.”

“Abracadabrool, Abaracadail, you will believe what you read in the Daily Mail!” shouted the wizard, and magically, all of the headlines in the newspapers suddenly changed.

“Benefits scroungers” they shouted. “Thieves!” they screamed. The people in the street turned on the poor, the ill and the disabled, shouting “you stole my money!” and “open your curtains and get a job, you scum!”

IDS laughed, and disappeared in a puff of smoke, as those with jobs attacked those who didn’t have jobs with rolled-up copies of the Daily Mail.

Later that day, IDS visited King Gideon and said “My King, I have collected £3bn from the poor, the ill and the disabled, as well as some elderly and some carers. Please accept this gift to your rich friends.”

And King Gideon did smile and told IDS “you have done well, for that is the exact amount I need to give them in tax cuts.”

And they lived smugly ever after.

Comments

  1. BROKEN BRITAIN UNDER TORIES – NFA
    The misery poverty and homelessness that the Welfare Cuts will and have caused are nothing new to the Welfare system ,but what of those that are of No Fixed Abode already within the system .Unbeknown to the public all claimants claiming of NFA were paid on a daily basis over the counter these payments where to pay for daily living expenses .Part of the Salvation Army went PLC some years ago and is run on a commercial basis .Now you have to make an appointment during weekdays to be admitted if you fit certain criteria and pay on a daily rate unless accepted and become long term .
    In these weather conditions how many die through hypothermia ,where is the so called safety net for these people .The new system is so flawed it is beyond belief ,the dire consequences of implementing this system has far more reaching repercussions than just reducing benefits .
    http://www.brokenbritainundertories.com

  2. BROKEN BRITAIN UNDER TORIES _ MARK HOBAN DWP MINISTER
    Mark Hoban a DWP Minister was the only Tory on the front bench yesterday during the ATOS debate opened by Michael Meecher .Over 30 MP’s were present from both parties ,there was an absence of the Disability Minister Esther Mcveigh showing no interest in the debate whatsoever intimating that the debate was a show case exercise rather than it being taken seriously .Hoban was made a Tory Party Whip by ID Smith and is a fellow Catholic so can we assume he also has the same views on the ATOS Fiasco that smith has .Mr Meecher has asked Smith to answer several questions concerning ATOS and its inexperience and contractual obligation concerning the WCA .I am not holding my breath for a positive response .The transcript of the debate can be read following the link below .
    http://www.parliament.uk/business/publications/hansard/commons/todays-commons-debates/read/unknown/431/
    http://www.brokenbritainundertories.com

  3. BROKEN BRITAIN UNDER TORIES –ATOS BLOOD MONEY
    Successive Governments have introduced some very unpopular policies and ministers have made some very antiquated comments in the past but nothing beats the WCA’s that has potentially caused 10,000 deaths .The profit ATOS made through a flawed system can only be classed as blood money .There was outcry at Thatcher as Health minister snatching school milk from children .Edwina Curry telling OAL’s if cold in winter knit a jumper .Norman Tebitt telling the unemployed to “get on their bikes” to look for work .Jack Straw as Home Secretary introducing a bill that makes it illegal for children in care homes to complain about abuse but ID Smith and Grayling supercede all four policies rolled into one by their arrogant disregard to life through their flawed implementation of dealing with the sick and disabled .
    http://www.brokenbritainundertories.com

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