In days gone by, a pushchair was a pushchair – a chair that a baby could sit in, and the mother would push. However, mothers have united in fury at the latest pushchair, manufactured by McLaren, that now comes with four-wheel drive, air-conditioning and front and back suspension.

“It’s ridiculous,” claimed Mumsnet founder carrotbake76. “I mean, I want the best for little Quentin, but I don’t need an embedded satellite navigation system informing him, in the voice of Chris Fucking Tarrant, where the nearest Early Learning Centre is, and I certainly don’t need the bleeping parking radar.”

“It’s a bloody pushchair, for christ’s sake. He sits in it, he gurgles a bit, I take him somewhere, I take him out of it – and can I fold it? Can I heckers like – it’s bigger than my 4×4!”

The “Baby Bugaboo GTi” is available for just £2,495, and McLaren engineers are proud of their latest pushchair. Head of Design, Juniper Branflake-Jones said that the “Baby Bugaboo GTi is the next step in pushchair design. Mothers don’t want the under-complications of a simple, folding, easy-to-store pushchair. What they want is the absolute, cast-iron guarantee that their child is going to be completely and utterly wrapped in cotton wool. That’s why we’ve created it to have a fully shock-resistant frame, and what’s more, it’s eco-friendly!”

“No self-respecting mother would be without one – you’d be practically KILLING your baby if you bought anything for under £2,300, frankly. And your child will love you forever if you spend more than £3,000. We did a survey, and found that mothers who spent less than £2,000 on their first pushchair were risking being hated by their children for life – and I do mean life.”

Babies have expressed their complete and utter ignorance for the pushchair, although some have expressed curiosity at the combination of ice-cream cone holder, milk bottle holder and rattle holder, while most have simply had fun playing with the air conditioning and the radio dials.

“Fun!” said 7-year-old Giles, from Bromley. “I know, I should have started walking years ago, but why walk when you can sit in the Baby Bugaboo GTi? THIS is the way forward. Now – take me to McDonalds, Baby Bugaboo!”